19/10/18 - Bath Fighter Danced Orange Clumsily
He clumsily climbed out of the orange cab and straightened his suit out. He stopped and took a look around to calm himself down, the trees danced and the birds splashed playfully in the bird bath without a care in the world. Then he become serious again. He wasn’t here to admire the city but to prove his wife innocent. This is the big moment he thought. “You can't stuff this up,” he said to himself. Taking a deep breath he whispered to himself “You are a fighter” then he knocked and opened the door. He walked confidently into the court room although he didn’t quite feel it.
You have used the prompt very creatively, Anna. Continue to think about your sentence length and type, and consider whether shorter sentences would add fluidity to your texts. You always choose interesting vocabulary, however, this is an area that can always be developed.
ReplyDeleteWell done Anna, this is an excellent piece of writing. The prompt words fit seamlessly into your story. I really enjoyed reading it. You set the scene very clearly and imaginatively. Your writing reminds me of thriller that I read recently, and it would be a great opening scene in a movie.
ReplyDeleteKeep up the great work.
Ms Brennock
Team 100 w/c
Dublin,
Ireland